This has been a crazy busy week and there are still two days to go. I'm going to make it, right?
I've felt like I've been coasting through the last week, just ticking away the days until I go away. I'm having a hard time remembering what I did on Tuesday and it's only Friday and that's just not like me. Oh, do I ever need a break!
Today I started running the minute I got up and haven't really stopped until just this moment. Though there was that beautiful 2 hour period where I had lunch with K and then Trin and I got pedicures but the time getting to that space and time afterward has just all blurred together. I remember it being 3pm and now it's 9. Tomorrow at the bright and sunny hour of 7:30am I'm heading to SC to do a walk-a-thon followed by a fabulous beautiful day at our local theme park for Christian Music Day with the youth. Yes, I am a little wacky.
Okay, I just got off the phone with Train Guy. Can I just say three year-olds can be absolutely adorable? He had K call me back because she hung up the phone without letting him say goodbye. That's all he said was goodbye. Too cute!
On that note, I'll end this post. Time to take my pampered tootsies to bed and rest up for tomorrows big walk!
Friday, May 9, 2008
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Small Towns
There are days when I really love living in my small town. I like running into my 5th grade teacher in the store or having my caramel mocha made by a student from my first years of YM. Some days it's really nice living in a small town.
Today it isn't when the name at the top of the headlines is someone that I know and like. Someone for whom my heart breaks. Today is a hard day to live in a small town.
Praying for all those effected.
Today it isn't when the name at the top of the headlines is someone that I know and like. Someone for whom my heart breaks. Today is a hard day to live in a small town.
Praying for all those effected.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Away
Two weeks from today I will be away. Or maybe not quite away but in the packing stages for my time away. See, in two weeks I will begin my week of Study Leave, a glorious wonderful time that is not a vacation, yet is away from the everyday-ness of work, where I spend hour upon hour reading books, talking with God and all that away from my desk, the church and the people that I lovingly refer to as "my kids", though they aren't really my kids, they are other people's kids, they are God's kids and they hang out with me at least once a week, which makes them "my kids". Have I told you that I'm going away? I think from that last rambling sentence you may see the reason why.
It's been several months since I have had any serious time off to regenerate my soul. I knew that it was close to being my time away last week when I walked into the church building and said to myself "I don't want to do this. I don't want to be here." That, my friends, is not the way a church leader likes to start off on a Sunday morning and yet there I was. It was the honest reaction from my soul. I need some space from church, from the everyday-ness of work. I need some time to spend with God, to look up and say "Hey, what's the deal?" and actually sit and wait for the answer. Not hurry onto the next thing or answer my cellphone or email or any of the other things that distract me from listening to God's answer. I need time away. (Okay, see now it's just becoming really fun to italicize "away". I am in serious need of a break.)
Making my time away even more fabulous is that I will be on a prayer retreat for 4 days followed by three days with a fabulous friend who is also in ministry and who makes me think and this is beginning to sound like the best Study Leave time ever. Ohhh, and the best part is that all of this will occur in the beautiful mountains on the shores of one of the best lakes in California and you can see why I'm really ready for my time away.
Two weeks and counting.
It's been several months since I have had any serious time off to regenerate my soul. I knew that it was close to being my time away last week when I walked into the church building and said to myself "I don't want to do this. I don't want to be here." That, my friends, is not the way a church leader likes to start off on a Sunday morning and yet there I was. It was the honest reaction from my soul. I need some space from church, from the everyday-ness of work. I need some time to spend with God, to look up and say "Hey, what's the deal?" and actually sit and wait for the answer. Not hurry onto the next thing or answer my cellphone or email or any of the other things that distract me from listening to God's answer. I need time away. (Okay, see now it's just becoming really fun to italicize "away". I am in serious need of a break.)
Making my time away even more fabulous is that I will be on a prayer retreat for 4 days followed by three days with a fabulous friend who is also in ministry and who makes me think and this is beginning to sound like the best Study Leave time ever. Ohhh, and the best part is that all of this will occur in the beautiful mountains on the shores of one of the best lakes in California and you can see why I'm really ready for my time away.
Two weeks and counting.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Dancing with grief
Monday K's dad died. It was unexpected and quick. There are snippets of things that she will always remember from these days such as sitting down with Train Guy trying to explain why Grandma is here and Grandpa is not or the exact place where she got the news. The days leading up until Friday's funeral will seem to drag on and then that time will be suddenly over. People will expect her to be done grieving in a couple of months, maybe even just a couple of weeks. But that grieving time cannot be rushed. She will feel what she feels when she feels it. For K time will pass slowly and quickly simultaneously.
Two years ago today I began a dance with grief. Not for a father but for a brother of the heart. It too was sudden, though not quite unexpected. There are snippets of memories from those days that will always be with me. Getting the phone call at worship team rehearsal and the hugs from K and others as I fell apart. Driving in the race car with Lil Bro knowing that we needed to be with each other but also knowing that we had nothing to say. Sitting on the shore at LT doing a lot of yelling at God (though being the private person I am the yelling happened in my head). My dance with grief was intense for a long time but gradually the dance slowed down. Every so often, though, it catches me off guard and sends me spinning in a new direction.
Friday I will stand in the audience as K's family begins their dance with grief. And a part of me will dance with them knowing that they too will have a "two years ago" day and that even then the grieving will not be done.
Two years ago today I began a dance with grief. Not for a father but for a brother of the heart. It too was sudden, though not quite unexpected. There are snippets of memories from those days that will always be with me. Getting the phone call at worship team rehearsal and the hugs from K and others as I fell apart. Driving in the race car with Lil Bro knowing that we needed to be with each other but also knowing that we had nothing to say. Sitting on the shore at LT doing a lot of yelling at God (though being the private person I am the yelling happened in my head). My dance with grief was intense for a long time but gradually the dance slowed down. Every so often, though, it catches me off guard and sends me spinning in a new direction.
Friday I will stand in the audience as K's family begins their dance with grief. And a part of me will dance with them knowing that they too will have a "two years ago" day and that even then the grieving will not be done.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Something stirring
The wind really kicked up around here last night. I noticed it because I was tossing and turning all night long. It's been pretty windy all day, the trees outside my office window have been in constant motion since I arrived. There seems to be something stirring in the air.
Yesterday I heard of three separate incidents with people I know that were eerily similar, each with very different outcomes. Today I heard of more incidents that makes me think, somethings stirring.
Yesterday I sat with a friend and talked about tough faith stuff, which has reverberated through my head for the last 24 hours, even making it's way into my dreams. Something is stirring.
Tonight I talk with Middle Schoolers about the power of Jesus can have in the midst of our problems. Tomorrow marks the day of a huge turning point in my understanding of Jesus' power in the midst of my problems. Something is stirring.
Tomorrow I talk with High Schoolers about dangerous prayers, where we ask God to search us, stretch us, break us and lead us. In three weeks I will be sitting on the shores of a lake asking God to search me, stretch me, break me and lead me. Yeah, I think something is stirring.
Yesterday I heard of three separate incidents with people I know that were eerily similar, each with very different outcomes. Today I heard of more incidents that makes me think, somethings stirring.
Yesterday I sat with a friend and talked about tough faith stuff, which has reverberated through my head for the last 24 hours, even making it's way into my dreams. Something is stirring.
Tonight I talk with Middle Schoolers about the power of Jesus can have in the midst of our problems. Tomorrow marks the day of a huge turning point in my understanding of Jesus' power in the midst of my problems. Something is stirring.
Tomorrow I talk with High Schoolers about dangerous prayers, where we ask God to search us, stretch us, break us and lead us. In three weeks I will be sitting on the shores of a lake asking God to search me, stretch me, break me and lead me. Yeah, I think something is stirring.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Calendars
I know a lot of people who use their palm pilots thingies to keep track of their lives. A couple of friends use the big, thick, day planners to keep life on schedule. Some people really rely on their online calendars or ones that come with a certain email program. I have the PC(USA) calendar that runs from June to May. I've always found it funny that it runs from June to May but to be honest, I like it that way.
The whole calendar year thing has never really worked for me. My life has always revolved around the school year. Seriously, Papa Bear taught school for 30+ years, our lives revolved around the school year. Even when I was out of college and working at a bookstore, I didn't make the switch to thinking about the year in terms of January to December. It's always September through August...okay wait, September through June because really July and August are just free months!
Anyway, it's highly appropriate that I now use the PC(USA) calendar that runs from June to May because that is just how my brain works. Today, the brand new one arrived. It's so pretty, with nice boxes that tell me when important days are coming up...like the celebration of the Small Church Ministry Sunday. That's a big one around here. Seriously though, I love this calendar. I have very specific rules for my calendar as well. All appointments need to be written in, even if they are after the fact and any that didn't happen need to be erased...yes I said erased because no pen comes near this calendar. Everything is written in pencil. EVERYTHING! Writing in pen in calendars only leads to trouble. If you have to change something and it's in pen, then there's the whole crossing out thing, which just makes for a messy calendar. Pencil is the only way to go.
Getting a new calendar is just so fabulous. It's clean and pretty, with that new calendar smell. Nothing has been written in it, the days are free, so if I wanted to I could trick myself into thinking that I'm a lady of leisure with nothing on her calendar, able to laze in the sunshine with a good book and a Diet Pepsi for the whole month of June...except reality intrudes when my calendar from 2007-2008 peeks out from beneath the new calendar. June is filled to overflowing and though much Diet Pepsi will be flowing that whole lady of leisure thing won't be happening.
For awhile, I will gaze on the pages with nothing written in the little boxes of days and sigh in longing for those days of leisure but soon my hand will begin to twitch and I will not be able to stop myself from reaching for my pencil to begin transferring birthdays, anniversaries, appointments and details to my new calendar. For though I like the sight of a calendar with nothing on it, I really like seeing my days take shape and new year begin.
The whole calendar year thing has never really worked for me. My life has always revolved around the school year. Seriously, Papa Bear taught school for 30+ years, our lives revolved around the school year. Even when I was out of college and working at a bookstore, I didn't make the switch to thinking about the year in terms of January to December. It's always September through August...okay wait, September through June because really July and August are just free months!
Anyway, it's highly appropriate that I now use the PC(USA) calendar that runs from June to May because that is just how my brain works. Today, the brand new one arrived. It's so pretty, with nice boxes that tell me when important days are coming up...like the celebration of the Small Church Ministry Sunday. That's a big one around here. Seriously though, I love this calendar. I have very specific rules for my calendar as well. All appointments need to be written in, even if they are after the fact and any that didn't happen need to be erased...yes I said erased because no pen comes near this calendar. Everything is written in pencil. EVERYTHING! Writing in pen in calendars only leads to trouble. If you have to change something and it's in pen, then there's the whole crossing out thing, which just makes for a messy calendar. Pencil is the only way to go.
Getting a new calendar is just so fabulous. It's clean and pretty, with that new calendar smell. Nothing has been written in it, the days are free, so if I wanted to I could trick myself into thinking that I'm a lady of leisure with nothing on her calendar, able to laze in the sunshine with a good book and a Diet Pepsi for the whole month of June...except reality intrudes when my calendar from 2007-2008 peeks out from beneath the new calendar. June is filled to overflowing and though much Diet Pepsi will be flowing that whole lady of leisure thing won't be happening.
For awhile, I will gaze on the pages with nothing written in the little boxes of days and sigh in longing for those days of leisure but soon my hand will begin to twitch and I will not be able to stop myself from reaching for my pencil to begin transferring birthdays, anniversaries, appointments and details to my new calendar. For though I like the sight of a calendar with nothing on it, I really like seeing my days take shape and new year begin.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Week in review
This has been a busy week. My Monday started earlier than usual and I've been running around ever since! It's amazing how busy life gets at certain points in the year. There is usually a lull in activity between Easter and summer, but it never lasts long. My lull was two weeks long. Now there are things scheduled almost every weekend through the middle of June.
Monday I got to spend a few hours being pampered and talking with a friend. We always wind up in some great theological discussions. It's always nice to share what I'm learning with a friend.
Tuesday and Wednesday are youth group nights which always brings about a whole lot of activity for me. I spent a lot of time looking over the curriculum for the next few weeks and preparing for some special events we have coming up. Throw in staff meeting, walking with K and the boys plus Bible Study with some of the High School students and my days were full. Oh and doing a few things that I would normally do on Thursdays because...
Thursday I went to my 2nd to last Come Away day of the season. I didn't have any major revelations but spent my time asking God a lot of questions. I'll let you know if I get any answers. After my Come Away I headed for meeting about the YAD's special event for General Assembly. We are 9 weeks away from General Assembly in SJ! I'm in charge of the t-shirts for the event amongst other things. It's kind of exciting to be a part of the planning for GA. After that meeting I headed back home for another meeting about Tapestry. I got home 12 hours after I left.
Friday was prom night for one of the local high schools. I have always wanted to do something for the students and never got my act together. This year, though, I offered to host a dinner for any students going to prom. That meant that I spent most of Friday, after Morning Glories Bible Study, going to Costco, cooking and helping with the transformation of the fireside room into the Fireside Bistro. It was amazing! A couple college students acted as the hostess and waitress, dressing up nicely and everything. We had so much fun that the college students now want to hold a college prom. This may become a tradition.
Saturday was a workday at the church, after which I got in a few hours of remote time (whoever decided that NCIS should have marathons on Saturday really, really is evil. I never watched that show until now!)
Today I was up extra early to put together the MediaShout for the 1st service, which I had neglected to do on Saturday. In a few minutes I am headed out the door for a Baby Shower and then it's time for RAW. And that, my friends was my week.
How was your week?
Monday I got to spend a few hours being pampered and talking with a friend. We always wind up in some great theological discussions. It's always nice to share what I'm learning with a friend.
Tuesday and Wednesday are youth group nights which always brings about a whole lot of activity for me. I spent a lot of time looking over the curriculum for the next few weeks and preparing for some special events we have coming up. Throw in staff meeting, walking with K and the boys plus Bible Study with some of the High School students and my days were full. Oh and doing a few things that I would normally do on Thursdays because...
Thursday I went to my 2nd to last Come Away day of the season. I didn't have any major revelations but spent my time asking God a lot of questions. I'll let you know if I get any answers. After my Come Away I headed for meeting about the YAD's special event for General Assembly. We are 9 weeks away from General Assembly in SJ! I'm in charge of the t-shirts for the event amongst other things. It's kind of exciting to be a part of the planning for GA. After that meeting I headed back home for another meeting about Tapestry. I got home 12 hours after I left.
Friday was prom night for one of the local high schools. I have always wanted to do something for the students and never got my act together. This year, though, I offered to host a dinner for any students going to prom. That meant that I spent most of Friday, after Morning Glories Bible Study, going to Costco, cooking and helping with the transformation of the fireside room into the Fireside Bistro. It was amazing! A couple college students acted as the hostess and waitress, dressing up nicely and everything. We had so much fun that the college students now want to hold a college prom. This may become a tradition.
Saturday was a workday at the church, after which I got in a few hours of remote time (whoever decided that NCIS should have marathons on Saturday really, really is evil. I never watched that show until now!)
Today I was up extra early to put together the MediaShout for the 1st service, which I had neglected to do on Saturday. In a few minutes I am headed out the door for a Baby Shower and then it's time for RAW. And that, my friends was my week.
How was your week?
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