Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Nit picking people

We've all met them...people who find fault with every.little.thing.

I usually handle these people as gracefully as possible or avoid them as best I can.

In my current job, avoiding isn't always possible.  One person I interact with, on an almost daily basis, finds something wrong WITH EVERYONE.  I, of course, have to send items to them for review and they always come back with "YOU" did this wrong or "YOU" did that wrong.  That is usually followed by a phone call telling me again why it was wrong and then they go off on a rant about the 50 other people who have done something wrong in the last hour that had to be corrected by this individual.  I recognize the insecurity of the other person behind their nitpicking.  I see the hidden feelings of inadequacy and recognize they are trying to feel better about themselves by making others look "worse".  I get it but I don't like it.  Sometimes I just get tired of it all.

I'm not a perfect person. I mess up.  A lot.  I apologize for my mistakes and try not to beat myself up too much...because really, I want to be perfect and every mistake reinforces the knowledge that I am not now nor will I ever be perfect.

There are times when my skin is thick enough to take criticism and nitpicking.  I let it roll right off of my back and move on to things that are of more importance.  Right now is not that time.  My skin is pretty thin.  I'm having a hard enough time just getting up to go to work in the morning; putting on an extra layer of toughness just isn't happening.  Everything feels personal, whether it is or isn't, justified or not.  My emotions are right at the surface and tears come forth without warning...sometimes I don't even realize they are rolling down my face.

I'm a little extra touchy these days, a little extra weary, very low on grace and just barely hanging on.  So to all you nit-pickers out there, if you pick on me and I start to cry, well, don't say I didn't warn you.