My phone buzzed with a new text message..."Hey Britt! What was the name of the tall kid that went to the Giants game?"
Back in July, I and other H.S. youth group leaders took a group of students up to the SF Giants game. It's a tradition, round here, and one that I look forward to every year. This year I had three students in my car. One young lady going to be a Junior and two young men going to be Freshmen. The car ride was interesting. My Junior friend has a lot of energy and talks a lot, no matter what, but combined with one squirrel-y going to be Freshmen boy and his tall friend, the car ride was extra fun.
So was the walk to the car to the stadium, the hours in the stadium, the walk back from the stadium to the car and the car ride home. Once back at the church, the two boys headed home before my Junior friend, so we sat in the parking lot and talked. We talked about the boys. We talked about being freshmen and going to a new school. We talked about how one of the boys was going to her school and didn't know anyone. It was then that I said, "It would really be cool, on the first day of school, if you said Hi to Tall Guy if you see him on campus." She looked at me and said "I can do that." No questions, no hesitation, just an understanding that it can be tough to be at a new school and she could do a little bit to make someone feel welcomed.
School starts this Wednesday. My Junior friend remembered. If she sees Tall Guy (we did figure out his name), she'll make a point to say Hi. Probably in her awkwardly social, goofy way...which is part of what makes her so lovable!
That, right there, is what keeps me attached to Youth Ministry. One simple conversation and one text message that reported she was listening, she remembered and she intends to follow through. A part of me didn't think she would remember...but then that text message came through. My heart is smiling.
Showing posts with label youth ministry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label youth ministry. Show all posts
Monday, August 24, 2015
Sunday, June 14, 2015
Done
Last spring, Youth Pastor friend made the decision to step away from full-time ministry. Can I just say, for the record, the timing between Youth Pastor friend making his decision official and leaving and my Dad's diagnosis and death really, really *ahem* stunk. But that's all for another post. Anyway, Youth Pastor friend's last day was the last Sunday in July 2014. A day later we learned there was a new Children and Youth Director starting the following Friday. A day later.
Side note: On behalf of volunteers in churches, I humbly ask that church hiring committees include at least one person who is involved in the specific ministry in question in the conversation about who is being hired...they don't have to be on the committee but at the very least ask for their input and then keep them in the loop about where the process stands. I cannot emphasize that last part enough.
It was a rocky start. The volunteer leaders were incredibly offended by the lack of communication (or warning) of someone new coming on board. Eventually, I sat down with the Lead Pastor and had a very open and honest conversation about the whole thing...as a volunteer and as former youth director. It was an incredibly wonderful, refreshing conversation.
The New Director was gracious and willing to work with the team and couldn't be faulted for the beginning. However, new beginnings are always difficult, especially with a group of 15 High School Seniors who just didn't want to adjust to a new person. It was tough going. As we moved farther and farther along, the High School leaders were all coming to a realization. All five of us, unbeknownst to the others, decided we were done. D.O.N.E. It wasn't healthy for us to continue as volunteers, knowing that we were having a hard time with some changes and feeling as though we were part of the reason why the group wasn't able to move forward. And then New Director announced his resignation.
It was when we sat down with some church leaders to discuss how things were going to proceed (yes, I pushed that meeting) that we all figured out just close we had all come to quitting. As we talked, it became apparent that we could keep things running through the end of the school year but after that two of the leaders definitely couldn't continue, one leader could continue but only until August, another leader was on the fence and really needed a break and then there was me. Four years ago, I could have run the program all summer by myself...when I was in full-time ministry! Now, there's not a chance. My 45+ hour a week job/commute barely allows me to be a competent volunteer.
So, the volunteers agreed to run weekly meetings through the end of the school year. We've been very open about our intentions with the Deacon board. We just can't keep going at the rate we're going. It's painful. It's hard to seemingly walk away from the students and this program that we have invested ourselves so deeply in, but this youth ministry train needs a really good engineer who is going to put time and energy it and make it work. We just can't keep pushing the train with a missing wheel, a wonky track and no coal or steam to power it.
Parents and church members have not been afraid to let me/us know just how they feel about the lack of youth group over the summer. I walked into church this morning and the person leading the announcements and prayer* started off by saying how disappointed she and her 14 year old son were that there wasn't anything happening over the summer. Not in a "we're so thankful for the volunteers who kept this going for the last three months and know they need a break" understanding kind of way, either. Then the person reading the scripture said pretty much the same thing. And then someone after church stopped me and said the same thing. Not one of those individuals volunteered to help do anything about the situation, though. They just lamented at the lack of something happening.
I left church this morning really, really tired, discouraged and done in a whole new sense. I don't need daily thank yous or to be told how wonderful we are, but I do need to hear grace, compassion and understanding amongst the laments. Sadly, in this situation, that has been lacking. One of the youth volunteers said on Wednesday night, as we were kind of debriefing and looking ahead, "I won't be coming to this church again." Wednesday night I was frustrated with that statement...this morning I got it.
*She also chastised those of us who come late to church on Sundays...and then her sons and husband walked into the sanctuary five minutes later. Words fail.
Side note: On behalf of volunteers in churches, I humbly ask that church hiring committees include at least one person who is involved in the specific ministry in question in the conversation about who is being hired...they don't have to be on the committee but at the very least ask for their input and then keep them in the loop about where the process stands. I cannot emphasize that last part enough.
It was a rocky start. The volunteer leaders were incredibly offended by the lack of communication (or warning) of someone new coming on board. Eventually, I sat down with the Lead Pastor and had a very open and honest conversation about the whole thing...as a volunteer and as former youth director. It was an incredibly wonderful, refreshing conversation.
The New Director was gracious and willing to work with the team and couldn't be faulted for the beginning. However, new beginnings are always difficult, especially with a group of 15 High School Seniors who just didn't want to adjust to a new person. It was tough going. As we moved farther and farther along, the High School leaders were all coming to a realization. All five of us, unbeknownst to the others, decided we were done. D.O.N.E. It wasn't healthy for us to continue as volunteers, knowing that we were having a hard time with some changes and feeling as though we were part of the reason why the group wasn't able to move forward. And then New Director announced his resignation.
It was when we sat down with some church leaders to discuss how things were going to proceed (yes, I pushed that meeting) that we all figured out just close we had all come to quitting. As we talked, it became apparent that we could keep things running through the end of the school year but after that two of the leaders definitely couldn't continue, one leader could continue but only until August, another leader was on the fence and really needed a break and then there was me. Four years ago, I could have run the program all summer by myself...when I was in full-time ministry! Now, there's not a chance. My 45+ hour a week job/commute barely allows me to be a competent volunteer.
So, the volunteers agreed to run weekly meetings through the end of the school year. We've been very open about our intentions with the Deacon board. We just can't keep going at the rate we're going. It's painful. It's hard to seemingly walk away from the students and this program that we have invested ourselves so deeply in, but this youth ministry train needs a really good engineer who is going to put time and energy it and make it work. We just can't keep pushing the train with a missing wheel, a wonky track and no coal or steam to power it.
Parents and church members have not been afraid to let me/us know just how they feel about the lack of youth group over the summer. I walked into church this morning and the person leading the announcements and prayer* started off by saying how disappointed she and her 14 year old son were that there wasn't anything happening over the summer. Not in a "we're so thankful for the volunteers who kept this going for the last three months and know they need a break" understanding kind of way, either. Then the person reading the scripture said pretty much the same thing. And then someone after church stopped me and said the same thing. Not one of those individuals volunteered to help do anything about the situation, though. They just lamented at the lack of something happening.
I left church this morning really, really tired, discouraged and done in a whole new sense. I don't need daily thank yous or to be told how wonderful we are, but I do need to hear grace, compassion and understanding amongst the laments. Sadly, in this situation, that has been lacking. One of the youth volunteers said on Wednesday night, as we were kind of debriefing and looking ahead, "I won't be coming to this church again." Wednesday night I was frustrated with that statement...this morning I got it.
*She also chastised those of us who come late to church on Sundays...and then her sons and husband walked into the sanctuary five minutes later. Words fail.
Sunday, May 11, 2014
Curve balls
Last Sunday afternoon I found myself flipping channels. On one station was a really awful horror movie, the type I NEVER let myself watch because my imagination already runs rampant enough. But there I was, my attention caught, as this cross between a human/bat kinda thing that was called a creeper stalked down unsuspecting humans. It was an awful movie. I will never go in a cornfield again.
On the other channel was the Hallmark movie of the week. Some schmaltzy equally awful romantic something or another that clearly wasn't as captivating as the human/bat creeper because I kept going back to that channel. Back and forth I went between the two until the creeper thing came to an end and then, well I wasn't going to watch Final Destination 2 or 3 or whatever it was, so I wound up on the Hallmark channel again.
Later that evening I was with a friend, relating my day spent watching two awful movies and beating myself up ever so slightly for wasting my day when the 2x4 of reality hit me over the head...watching those two movies was really all I could do that day, I had no more emotional or mental strength left.
Almost two weeks ago, now, Tuesday my Dad or Papa Bear as he is known on this blog, was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia. Just like that he went from living to be 105 like Great-Grandpa Ben to really hoping to make it to 73 or 74 or 75 or 76, heck 80! There's a lot they are doing to treat Acute Myeloid Leukemia and we are going to be aggressive and fight this all the way into remission but still, the blow of the fragility of life took it's toll.
Yo Momma and I were on our way to meeting Lil' Bro and family at the Happiest Place on Earth when we got the news. Yo Momma has a lead foot when she wants to...she almost cut across two lanes of traffic to make a u-turn to head home. I did wind up going to meet Lil' Bro the next day and we spent three days together attempting to push away reality at the Happiest Place on Earth, being family and keeping things normal for Little Miss P. Sometimes you just do what you gotta do.
Last Sunday morning I woke with dread knowing what was coming in church that day and not wanting to get up. Not only did I not want to talk about what is happening with Papa Bear, I knew that sometime before church was over Youth Pastor Friend was going to tell the congregation he was leaving full-time ministry. Even knowing it was the right decision and that God is in the midst of his decision, it was still hard to sit and listen to the words flow from his lips. There was this horrible mix in my head of Youth Pastor friend leaving, Papa Bear's life in crisis and my own sense of everything being so far out of control I just couldn't breathe.
And so, there I was on Sunday afternoon with nothing left in me, watching a horrible horror movie and a horrible Hallmark romance and occasionally finding tears welling up in my eyes. Tears are only a millisecond away these days. It's been a long couple of weeks and there are longer weeks ahead.
Tomorrow I will get up and go to work as usual. Yo Momma and Papa Bear will get up and call the hospital to find out what time he is to admitted. Five weeks from now we hope the leukemia is in remission so that a bone marrow transplant can take place. As I have told Papa Bear, there are no options, he will fight this and he will fight this hard. We are going to kick leukemia to the curb.
This afternoon Papa Bear and I sat in the family room and watched the Giants and Dodgers battle for a win. We watched the players do their thing and eventually cheered when the Giants won in the 10th inning (they can never make it an easy win). I look forward to the day when Papa Bear and I can go to another Giants game together at AT & T park. I will buy the best seats possible for that game. Life throws curve balls every once in a while and sometimes all we can do is just step back and watch them go by, waiting for just the right moment to hit that ball right out of the park.
On the other channel was the Hallmark movie of the week. Some schmaltzy equally awful romantic something or another that clearly wasn't as captivating as the human/bat creeper because I kept going back to that channel. Back and forth I went between the two until the creeper thing came to an end and then, well I wasn't going to watch Final Destination 2 or 3 or whatever it was, so I wound up on the Hallmark channel again.
Later that evening I was with a friend, relating my day spent watching two awful movies and beating myself up ever so slightly for wasting my day when the 2x4 of reality hit me over the head...watching those two movies was really all I could do that day, I had no more emotional or mental strength left.
Almost two weeks ago, now, Tuesday my Dad or Papa Bear as he is known on this blog, was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia. Just like that he went from living to be 105 like Great-Grandpa Ben to really hoping to make it to 73 or 74 or 75 or 76, heck 80! There's a lot they are doing to treat Acute Myeloid Leukemia and we are going to be aggressive and fight this all the way into remission but still, the blow of the fragility of life took it's toll.
Yo Momma and I were on our way to meeting Lil' Bro and family at the Happiest Place on Earth when we got the news. Yo Momma has a lead foot when she wants to...she almost cut across two lanes of traffic to make a u-turn to head home. I did wind up going to meet Lil' Bro the next day and we spent three days together attempting to push away reality at the Happiest Place on Earth, being family and keeping things normal for Little Miss P. Sometimes you just do what you gotta do.
Last Sunday morning I woke with dread knowing what was coming in church that day and not wanting to get up. Not only did I not want to talk about what is happening with Papa Bear, I knew that sometime before church was over Youth Pastor Friend was going to tell the congregation he was leaving full-time ministry. Even knowing it was the right decision and that God is in the midst of his decision, it was still hard to sit and listen to the words flow from his lips. There was this horrible mix in my head of Youth Pastor friend leaving, Papa Bear's life in crisis and my own sense of everything being so far out of control I just couldn't breathe.
And so, there I was on Sunday afternoon with nothing left in me, watching a horrible horror movie and a horrible Hallmark romance and occasionally finding tears welling up in my eyes. Tears are only a millisecond away these days. It's been a long couple of weeks and there are longer weeks ahead.
Tomorrow I will get up and go to work as usual. Yo Momma and Papa Bear will get up and call the hospital to find out what time he is to admitted. Five weeks from now we hope the leukemia is in remission so that a bone marrow transplant can take place. As I have told Papa Bear, there are no options, he will fight this and he will fight this hard. We are going to kick leukemia to the curb.
This afternoon Papa Bear and I sat in the family room and watched the Giants and Dodgers battle for a win. We watched the players do their thing and eventually cheered when the Giants won in the 10th inning (they can never make it an easy win). I look forward to the day when Papa Bear and I can go to another Giants game together at AT & T park. I will buy the best seats possible for that game. Life throws curve balls every once in a while and sometimes all we can do is just step back and watch them go by, waiting for just the right moment to hit that ball right out of the park.
Saturday, April 12, 2014
Four different towns
I have been to four different regions for disaster recovery in the last 8 years. Each place has its own feel and stories to tell. Mississippi had a resiliency that grew with each trip. Galveston, TX felt like a resort town that had been forgotten. Joplin, MO had a feeling of despondency that was there long before the tornado. Oklahoma, Moore, had a heavy weight of depression. For the first time in all these trips, hope seemed far, far away.
Now, I may be extra sensitive to depression these days. I've been under that cloud in the last couple of years. I could have sensed something that wasn't as deep as I perceived it to be but when I think about the week in Moore and the people I met, which weren't that many, the overwhelming feeling I got from them was depression.
Of all three areas, Moore was the one area that was rebuilding the quickest. There really wasn't many visible remnants of the tornado, at least to someone who hadn't been there before. The schools were the most noticeable but they are definitely rebuilding them. There are housing subdivisions going up all over the place. The hospital is still four mobile units in a parking lot where something else used to be, but I didn't see piles and piles of debris or such vastly cleared land that it was obvious that a tornado had come through. I saw that in the eyes of Eliza (name changed).
Eliza was the one homeowner my team worked for that we met. The first day she drove up in her mini-van and said hello, conversed briefly and went inside. The second day she drove up, said hello and went inside. Later she went out, picked up her children and then came back and talked a little more. The third day I coaxed a little of her story out of her. Eliza and her children were in Plaza Towers Elementary school when the tornado hit. Plaza Towers is the school where several children lost their lives. She and her daughter were hurt, with her daughter receiving injuries to her back and neck. Eliza didn't elaborate and I didn't push. Just getting that much information from her was tough. There have been other things that have happened since the tornado adding to the burden on Eliza's shoulders. Her father had a stroke at Thanksgiving and Eliza is responsible for taking him to his therapy appointments. In her eyes I could see just how tired she was. The burdens she is carrying are huge and yet, as she stated, she is a survivor.
Dwight was a man who happened to walk down the street as we were packing up one day. He stopped to say hello and 10 minutes later I had learned that his daughter had lost her house in the tornado. She had moved in with Dwight and his wife, which turned out to be a blessing as Dwight's wife had cancer. She passed away in October. Dwight looked at me and said "At least she got to spend the last 6 months of her life with her daughter." He was a little amazed that we had come all the way from California to help. There was a little more spark in Dwight's eyes but the heaviness of life's ups and downs was evident again. He continued on down the street, after advising us of the best place to eat in Oklahoma City, off to Bingo at the church that night.
The homeowners at other sites were around more. One team wound up helping multiple people on a block. At the end of the week, we all gathered in the driveway at one house for lunch. That homeowner couldn't have been more delighted that we all showed up to her house. She had us take a team picture, right there in the driveway. Another homeowner made key chains for everyone on the team with wood from the tree that came down in her yard during the tornado. They too had the same weight of despair and yet, by the end of the week the teams had done their jobs. Maybe they hadn't gotten all of the physical work done but they got the emotional work done...they brought hope. These rebuilding trips aren't just about physical buildings, many times it's the emotional and spiritual rebuilding that is most needed.
On Friday, my team was painting a shed at a house that is still under construction. The homeowners needed a place to store items, so a shed was built and put on the site. 5 young women gathered around that shed and about 20 minutes in I realized the sound of their laughter and singing could be heard clear down the block. I thought about telling them to hush for a split second and then continued to paint the trim on the back of the shed. These young women were bringing something desperately needed to this town...the sound of joy and laughter, the sound of hope and friendship. It was a beautiful way to end the week.
Four different places, four different feelings and yet the need remains the same. I believe, in our own unique ways, in each place we have accomplished the goal set before us by God...throughout everything we continue to remind people to have hope.
Now, I may be extra sensitive to depression these days. I've been under that cloud in the last couple of years. I could have sensed something that wasn't as deep as I perceived it to be but when I think about the week in Moore and the people I met, which weren't that many, the overwhelming feeling I got from them was depression.
Of all three areas, Moore was the one area that was rebuilding the quickest. There really wasn't many visible remnants of the tornado, at least to someone who hadn't been there before. The schools were the most noticeable but they are definitely rebuilding them. There are housing subdivisions going up all over the place. The hospital is still four mobile units in a parking lot where something else used to be, but I didn't see piles and piles of debris or such vastly cleared land that it was obvious that a tornado had come through. I saw that in the eyes of Eliza (name changed).
Eliza was the one homeowner my team worked for that we met. The first day she drove up in her mini-van and said hello, conversed briefly and went inside. The second day she drove up, said hello and went inside. Later she went out, picked up her children and then came back and talked a little more. The third day I coaxed a little of her story out of her. Eliza and her children were in Plaza Towers Elementary school when the tornado hit. Plaza Towers is the school where several children lost their lives. She and her daughter were hurt, with her daughter receiving injuries to her back and neck. Eliza didn't elaborate and I didn't push. Just getting that much information from her was tough. There have been other things that have happened since the tornado adding to the burden on Eliza's shoulders. Her father had a stroke at Thanksgiving and Eliza is responsible for taking him to his therapy appointments. In her eyes I could see just how tired she was. The burdens she is carrying are huge and yet, as she stated, she is a survivor.
Dwight was a man who happened to walk down the street as we were packing up one day. He stopped to say hello and 10 minutes later I had learned that his daughter had lost her house in the tornado. She had moved in with Dwight and his wife, which turned out to be a blessing as Dwight's wife had cancer. She passed away in October. Dwight looked at me and said "At least she got to spend the last 6 months of her life with her daughter." He was a little amazed that we had come all the way from California to help. There was a little more spark in Dwight's eyes but the heaviness of life's ups and downs was evident again. He continued on down the street, after advising us of the best place to eat in Oklahoma City, off to Bingo at the church that night.
The homeowners at other sites were around more. One team wound up helping multiple people on a block. At the end of the week, we all gathered in the driveway at one house for lunch. That homeowner couldn't have been more delighted that we all showed up to her house. She had us take a team picture, right there in the driveway. Another homeowner made key chains for everyone on the team with wood from the tree that came down in her yard during the tornado. They too had the same weight of despair and yet, by the end of the week the teams had done their jobs. Maybe they hadn't gotten all of the physical work done but they got the emotional work done...they brought hope. These rebuilding trips aren't just about physical buildings, many times it's the emotional and spiritual rebuilding that is most needed.
On Friday, my team was painting a shed at a house that is still under construction. The homeowners needed a place to store items, so a shed was built and put on the site. 5 young women gathered around that shed and about 20 minutes in I realized the sound of their laughter and singing could be heard clear down the block. I thought about telling them to hush for a split second and then continued to paint the trim on the back of the shed. These young women were bringing something desperately needed to this town...the sound of joy and laughter, the sound of hope and friendship. It was a beautiful way to end the week.
Four different places, four different feelings and yet the need remains the same. I believe, in our own unique ways, in each place we have accomplished the goal set before us by God...throughout everything we continue to remind people to have hope.
Monday, March 31, 2014
Legacy
Hello from OKC!
It's tough to blog without a full keyboard, but I had the overwhelming need to get my thoughts out on "paper"...so here goes.
Today was our first full day of work. The group was split into 5 teams and I was put in charge of one team. I chose the work I knew I could handle, Sheetrock, which is hysterical in one sense because I have struggled nightly with Sheetrock over the life of these trips. Many a swear word has been uttered.
Anyhow, my team was at Eddie's house finishing up one missing, taping, sanding and patching. Let me just say, it was a struggle. The students were excellent. They were helpful, eager, excite and ready...and none of them knew a thing about what we were doing.
About halfway through the day, after teaching mudding techniques, "scrape off the excess into the tray like this to get a clean line", showing how to fill holes and sand down excess, I faced the holes in the ceiling. I knew enough to fake it...and asked for help when I didn't but mostly I stood back, gave instruction and let the students go for it. It was a challenging day. At the end of the day, as we put one last piece of drywall in, the heard myself say to the young woman who was struggling with the screw,"Keep going,but will suck in," and I knew that I had one person to thank for the knowledge I had used all day long...it was the same man whose words had just flown from my lips...my friend Ben. Those 10 trips to Mississippi where Ben taught, encouraged, led, forced me to try and instilled his knowledge in my soul had just come to fruition. Today I passed on Ben's legacy to 2 young men and 2 young women...and it was good.
It's tough to blog without a full keyboard, but I had the overwhelming need to get my thoughts out on "paper"...so here goes.
Today was our first full day of work. The group was split into 5 teams and I was put in charge of one team. I chose the work I knew I could handle, Sheetrock, which is hysterical in one sense because I have struggled nightly with Sheetrock over the life of these trips. Many a swear word has been uttered.
Anyhow, my team was at Eddie's house finishing up one missing, taping, sanding and patching. Let me just say, it was a struggle. The students were excellent. They were helpful, eager, excite and ready...and none of them knew a thing about what we were doing.
About halfway through the day, after teaching mudding techniques, "scrape off the excess into the tray like this to get a clean line", showing how to fill holes and sand down excess, I faced the holes in the ceiling. I knew enough to fake it...and asked for help when I didn't but mostly I stood back, gave instruction and let the students go for it. It was a challenging day. At the end of the day, as we put one last piece of drywall in, the heard myself say to the young woman who was struggling with the screw,"Keep going,but will suck in," and I knew that I had one person to thank for the knowledge I had used all day long...it was the same man whose words had just flown from my lips...my friend Ben. Those 10 trips to Mississippi where Ben taught, encouraged, led, forced me to try and instilled his knowledge in my soul had just come to fruition. Today I passed on Ben's legacy to 2 young men and 2 young women...and it was good.
Saturday, March 29, 2014
Leaving on a jet plane...
Good Saturday morning. Today begins my 16th adventure in Disaster Recovery in 8 years. I'm so excited!
Our team of 48--33 High School Students and 15 adults--will be in Moore, Oklahoma all week doing whatever God has planned for us. I'm ready to be back in my boots, jeans and t-shirt, gloves at the ready and wide open adventure ahead.
I don't know if there will be wi-fi access where we are, so blogging will probably not happen (plus, I'm just taking my Kindle and it takes a LONG time to write a blog post on a Kindle. I do so much better with traditional computer keyboards.).
However, Youth Pastor Friend will be posting to the youth group Facebook page as much as possible. You can find photo's here: www.facebook.com/edgeandoasis Even if you aren't on Facebook (I keep thinking I'm it's time to close my page...tired of the fake lives on there) you will still be able to see photo's of the day and any updates.
So, if you are of the praying time, please pray for the team! For safety, sleep, good conversations, good work and financial support to keep rolling in! I'll catch ya on the flip side!
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Teenagers, life events and disaster relief
Working with teenagers keeps me grounded.
Last week I wore one of my favorite shirts ever to youth group. It's a grey, long sleeve t-shirt and simply says "Pearlington, Mississippi" on the front. The back has the names of people who helped our team go to Mississippi that time for Hurricane Katrina Relief work. I don't even remember what year or which number of the 12 trips it was.
One of young women looked at my t-shirt and asked "Where's Pearlington, Mississippi?"
I told her where it was and why I had been there and she looked at me with a puzzled look on her face and said "When was Hurricane Katrina?"
"2005," I replied.
"Oh, yeah, I was 5," was her response.
One of the other leaders looked at me and said with a touch of incredulity in his voice, "She was a year old when September 11th happened." We both took a moment to ponder that.
Time marches steadily on. There isn't anything I can do to stop the steady movement. There are days when I look at the number I am supposed to claim as my age and wonder how those years passed so quickly. I don't FEEL like the number I'm supposed to claim as my age. Do you know how OLD that number seemed when I was a teenager?!
Time marches on and world and life events happen. There are events, such as September 11th or Hurricane Katrina that will forever be etched in my brain. Those events changed my world outlook. They changed ME...and many of the students that I work with these days weren't even old enough to understand. They will have their own BIG life and world changing moments. It's just the way the world works.
Time marches on. This April it will be 8 years since I first set foot in the town of Pearlington, Mississippi. It's been over a year since I was last there. I hope to get back there again. This time for vacation, not Hurricane relief work. But if something happens and the call comes again, I'll go in a heartbeat!
In 3 days I will board a plane with some of my teenager friends (33 of them to be exact) and head to Moore, Oklahoma. Time does march on, life does change and teenagers really do keep me grounded...and in case you were wondering, I am taking my favorite long sleeve t-shirt with me.
Last week I wore one of my favorite shirts ever to youth group. It's a grey, long sleeve t-shirt and simply says "Pearlington, Mississippi" on the front. The back has the names of people who helped our team go to Mississippi that time for Hurricane Katrina Relief work. I don't even remember what year or which number of the 12 trips it was.
One of young women looked at my t-shirt and asked "Where's Pearlington, Mississippi?"
I told her where it was and why I had been there and she looked at me with a puzzled look on her face and said "When was Hurricane Katrina?"
"2005," I replied.
"Oh, yeah, I was 5," was her response.
One of the other leaders looked at me and said with a touch of incredulity in his voice, "She was a year old when September 11th happened." We both took a moment to ponder that.
Time marches steadily on. There isn't anything I can do to stop the steady movement. There are days when I look at the number I am supposed to claim as my age and wonder how those years passed so quickly. I don't FEEL like the number I'm supposed to claim as my age. Do you know how OLD that number seemed when I was a teenager?!
Time marches on and world and life events happen. There are events, such as September 11th or Hurricane Katrina that will forever be etched in my brain. Those events changed my world outlook. They changed ME...and many of the students that I work with these days weren't even old enough to understand. They will have their own BIG life and world changing moments. It's just the way the world works.
Time marches on. This April it will be 8 years since I first set foot in the town of Pearlington, Mississippi. It's been over a year since I was last there. I hope to get back there again. This time for vacation, not Hurricane relief work. But if something happens and the call comes again, I'll go in a heartbeat!
In 3 days I will board a plane with some of my teenager friends (33 of them to be exact) and head to Moore, Oklahoma. Time does march on, life does change and teenagers really do keep me grounded...and in case you were wondering, I am taking my favorite long sleeve t-shirt with me.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
From Youth Pastor to volunteer
This post was started a few weeks ago...
I went to Youth Group last night. I sat around the fire pit and talked with people. I ran after the dodge balls that flew past the group. I gave and received hugs. I sat in the back on the ugly and uncomfortable seating and listened to the youth volunteer speak. I listened to God say "It's not about where you are going, it's about who you are going there with." I stayed afterwards and talked with a couple of others and was one of the last to leave.
I also watched the group. The youth knew what was happening. They had the routine down. They went with the flow. They did what they were asked. They laughed, they played, they listened, they prayed, they interacted with their friends...sometimes with the others.
I watched the leaders. They engaged the youth, they joined in the fun, they talked to each other and then they left.
I watched my friend, the Youth Pastor. I knew he had put hours in beforehand setting things up. I saw the weariness on his face. I saw him enter into the game, letting go and playing for a few seconds, the tiredness on his face easing. I saw him specifically go sit next to kids just to talk. I saw him sit next to the one kid who needs just a little bit more attention while the volunteer youth worker was speaking. I watched him head outside, as the group ended, to sit around the fire, talk with kids and greet parents as all his volunteers stayed inside...talking with each other.
Just the night before I had sat and listened for awhile as he shared the burdens on his heart. I heard my own story in his words. I heard the weariness, the frustration, the disillusionment with church people, the burden of too much on his plate. I heard it all and understood. I see the signs and I pray, oh how I pray, that God reveals the path ahead of Youth Pastor friend soon...and selfishly hope that path doesn't lead him away.
Sitting in the back, joining the group for the first time, being in a youth group setting for the first time since I left my own two years ago (wow, that seems so long ago!), knowing the back story, I made a decision. I made a decision not be the typical volunteer leader who comes just before group starts and leaves just after it's over. I may have worked all day, commuted up to 3 hours round-trip and have to get up early the next morning to do it all over again. I may show up just before group starts just because I can't get there any sooner but I will be one of the last to leave. I will be the volunteer who hangs out and listens to Youth Pastor when he needs to download the nights events. I will be tired at work the next day but that doesn't matter. The spiritual and emotional health of Youth Pastor friend is more important.
It's been a few weeks since I started attending youth group. I'm slowly finding my way and I think that God may have put the desire to volunteer on my heart, not for the benefit of the teens, but to be an encourager and supporter of the volunteers. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely some teens that need some one on one attention I will gladly give...but a couple of the volunteers, they may actually be the people I am at youth group for. It's a new road, a new journey, a new tale to tell.
I went to Youth Group last night. I sat around the fire pit and talked with people. I ran after the dodge balls that flew past the group. I gave and received hugs. I sat in the back on the ugly and uncomfortable seating and listened to the youth volunteer speak. I listened to God say "It's not about where you are going, it's about who you are going there with." I stayed afterwards and talked with a couple of others and was one of the last to leave.
I also watched the group. The youth knew what was happening. They had the routine down. They went with the flow. They did what they were asked. They laughed, they played, they listened, they prayed, they interacted with their friends...sometimes with the others.
I watched the leaders. They engaged the youth, they joined in the fun, they talked to each other and then they left.
I watched my friend, the Youth Pastor. I knew he had put hours in beforehand setting things up. I saw the weariness on his face. I saw him enter into the game, letting go and playing for a few seconds, the tiredness on his face easing. I saw him specifically go sit next to kids just to talk. I saw him sit next to the one kid who needs just a little bit more attention while the volunteer youth worker was speaking. I watched him head outside, as the group ended, to sit around the fire, talk with kids and greet parents as all his volunteers stayed inside...talking with each other.
Just the night before I had sat and listened for awhile as he shared the burdens on his heart. I heard my own story in his words. I heard the weariness, the frustration, the disillusionment with church people, the burden of too much on his plate. I heard it all and understood. I see the signs and I pray, oh how I pray, that God reveals the path ahead of Youth Pastor friend soon...and selfishly hope that path doesn't lead him away.
Sitting in the back, joining the group for the first time, being in a youth group setting for the first time since I left my own two years ago (wow, that seems so long ago!), knowing the back story, I made a decision. I made a decision not be the typical volunteer leader who comes just before group starts and leaves just after it's over. I may have worked all day, commuted up to 3 hours round-trip and have to get up early the next morning to do it all over again. I may show up just before group starts just because I can't get there any sooner but I will be one of the last to leave. I will be the volunteer who hangs out and listens to Youth Pastor when he needs to download the nights events. I will be tired at work the next day but that doesn't matter. The spiritual and emotional health of Youth Pastor friend is more important.
It's been a few weeks since I started attending youth group. I'm slowly finding my way and I think that God may have put the desire to volunteer on my heart, not for the benefit of the teens, but to be an encourager and supporter of the volunteers. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely some teens that need some one on one attention I will gladly give...but a couple of the volunteers, they may actually be the people I am at youth group for. It's a new road, a new journey, a new tale to tell.
Monday, February 4, 2013
The car phenomenon redux
When I was in youth ministry I used to be amazed at the power held by the front seat of the car. Not just those annoying squabbles that would start the moment the car came into view about who got "shot gun" but the power the front seat had to turn the quietest kid into a veritable fountain of words. It was not the wisest decision to drive teens places by myself, I recognize my naivete looking back, but those moments driving kids home were precious and so important.
Of course, the car phenomenon also occurred when other teens were in the car but it took on a different twist. The adult driver, whoever they were, ceased to be a person with ears listening to the conversation. I learned more about the youth in the youth group I was leading driving on a 2 hour car trips than I did at youth group nights for two months. Only the shrewdest of youth members would remember that I was driving the car, but usually it was like I wasn't in there or suddenly couldn't understand their language, the fountain of words would just flow. I would pipe in from time to time with a comment, especially when the conversation got a little too iffy for a youth group trip, or burst out laughing at the most absurd parts of the conversation just because I could not contain the laughter any more. Those conversations are why we had monthly youth group excursions to places at least a half hour away.
A few former youth members, whom I now call friends, and I headed out to the Big City this past weekend. It was about an hour and a half car ride. The topics of discussion were varied and fun and we reminisced about the days of long youth group car trips. They are at a point now where they are the adults taking youth group members places and they experience what I experienced. It was awesome.
But the moment that clinched the whole day for me came in the 10 minute car ride from dropping one person off to the other persons house. I was driving, they were in the back seat (too tired to move) and the power of the back seat was immense. The fountain of words began to flow, so much so that we sat in their driveway for 10 minutes just talking. I looked in the rear view mirror at this former youth member, who I now call friend, and tried really hard not to cry. For sitting looking back at me was an adult, but also a teenager I had shuttled home for years, and there I was listening to them share their heart all these years later.
While much has changed, the phenomenon of the car remains.
Of course, the car phenomenon also occurred when other teens were in the car but it took on a different twist. The adult driver, whoever they were, ceased to be a person with ears listening to the conversation. I learned more about the youth in the youth group I was leading driving on a 2 hour car trips than I did at youth group nights for two months. Only the shrewdest of youth members would remember that I was driving the car, but usually it was like I wasn't in there or suddenly couldn't understand their language, the fountain of words would just flow. I would pipe in from time to time with a comment, especially when the conversation got a little too iffy for a youth group trip, or burst out laughing at the most absurd parts of the conversation just because I could not contain the laughter any more. Those conversations are why we had monthly youth group excursions to places at least a half hour away.
A few former youth members, whom I now call friends, and I headed out to the Big City this past weekend. It was about an hour and a half car ride. The topics of discussion were varied and fun and we reminisced about the days of long youth group car trips. They are at a point now where they are the adults taking youth group members places and they experience what I experienced. It was awesome.
But the moment that clinched the whole day for me came in the 10 minute car ride from dropping one person off to the other persons house. I was driving, they were in the back seat (too tired to move) and the power of the back seat was immense. The fountain of words began to flow, so much so that we sat in their driveway for 10 minutes just talking. I looked in the rear view mirror at this former youth member, who I now call friend, and tried really hard not to cry. For sitting looking back at me was an adult, but also a teenager I had shuttled home for years, and there I was listening to them share their heart all these years later.
While much has changed, the phenomenon of the car remains.
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Joplin Bound
Having an employer with a motto of "Service Above Self" is a good thing. They didn't even blink when I said, at my initial interview, that I would be in Joplin, Missouri this week. In fact, they are even letting me make up hours when I get back. So awesome!
Today I join 32 of my closest HSCC friends and one favorite from FPC. We'll be spending a week in Joplin helping with Tornado Recovery work. In a little twist of irony, my friend Tom from Mississippi called me soon after the tornado hit last May and asked if I would be willing to take a group to Joplin. I'm sure you all know my response. :) It turned out that there were plenty of other groups going at that time but here I am, almost a year later, making the trek. I'm not sure what to pray for this week besides an openness and willingness to follow God.
If you would like to check on our progress, you can go here -->hsccyouth.org<-- , click on the "Oasis" circle and follow the link on that page to get all the latest updates and photos and maybe even some video blogs from the students.
See you in a week (unless I get computer access and then you never know!)
Today I join 32 of my closest HSCC friends and one favorite from FPC. We'll be spending a week in Joplin helping with Tornado Recovery work. In a little twist of irony, my friend Tom from Mississippi called me soon after the tornado hit last May and asked if I would be willing to take a group to Joplin. I'm sure you all know my response. :) It turned out that there were plenty of other groups going at that time but here I am, almost a year later, making the trek. I'm not sure what to pray for this week besides an openness and willingness to follow God.
If you would like to check on our progress, you can go here -->hsccyouth.org<-- , click on the "Oasis" circle and follow the link on that page to get all the latest updates and photos and maybe even some video blogs from the students.
See you in a week (unless I get computer access and then you never know!)
Friday, December 30, 2011
Around the table
There were 12 around the table, not including me. 12 that span the range of my youth career really. There were the ones that were in the first group and the ones were in the last group. There were many missing but these 12 represented 11 years of my life as youth director.
I sat back for a moment and took a few pictures with my phone but mental pictures as well. I listened to them laugh and chatter. I listened to conversations flow back and forth and it felt good. One of them looked up at one point and said "we need to make this an annual thing!". I'm pretty sure that can be arranged.
Sitting around the table tonight, I was reminded of the good that has come into my life from following God...and vowed to hang on, to continue to follow God down this winding road.
I sat back for a moment and took a few pictures with my phone but mental pictures as well. I listened to them laugh and chatter. I listened to conversations flow back and forth and it felt good. One of them looked up at one point and said "we need to make this an annual thing!". I'm pretty sure that can be arranged.
Sitting around the table tonight, I was reminded of the good that has come into my life from following God...and vowed to hang on, to continue to follow God down this winding road.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Getting real
Five of us sat around tonight talking. We talked about this, we talked about that, we talked church, we talked life, we just talked. The margarita's helped a little but truthfully it doesn't take much to get this group chatting. Well, four of the group. I tend to sit on the sidelines and interject occasionally...there's always one in the crowd, right?
One of the five was new to the group. At one point one looked over and said to her "Sorry, we probably sound really awful right now." To which the response was "Are you kidding, Christians being real?!" which implied that it was refreshing to hear four Christian women just tell it like they see it. Which reminded me why I like hanging out with these particular women, they aren't afraid to be real.
Real in the sense that we can say what is on our hearts and we aren't judged. Real in the sense that if one shares a struggle, the rest of us don't doubt that she is still a Christian. Real in the sense that when one of us lets loose with some "unholy" language there is no harsh intake of breath like she has just committed a mortal sin. I could keep going but I think you get it.
Our conversation tonight is what I find missing in most Christian circles, and to be perfectly honest, is what a lot of younger people are feeling is missing from churches. I'm not sure it's a new phenomenon, maybe the conversations have just changed a little, gotten a little grittier. Still the sentiment is there, we want church to be a place where we can be real and still find acceptance and love. I even saw it in the youth group setting. When we combined the high school and young adult group for the summer, the conversations got grittier, things were said that were more authentic, less covered with the constant thought (on my part) that I would have to answer to their parents if we went too far in the conversation. After one such conversation, S looked at her friend and said "I like grown-up youth group." Christians being real...it's appealing.
I sat around a living room tonight with four other Christian women being real...it was good.
One of the five was new to the group. At one point one looked over and said to her "Sorry, we probably sound really awful right now." To which the response was "Are you kidding, Christians being real?!" which implied that it was refreshing to hear four Christian women just tell it like they see it. Which reminded me why I like hanging out with these particular women, they aren't afraid to be real.
Real in the sense that we can say what is on our hearts and we aren't judged. Real in the sense that if one shares a struggle, the rest of us don't doubt that she is still a Christian. Real in the sense that when one of us lets loose with some "unholy" language there is no harsh intake of breath like she has just committed a mortal sin. I could keep going but I think you get it.
Our conversation tonight is what I find missing in most Christian circles, and to be perfectly honest, is what a lot of younger people are feeling is missing from churches. I'm not sure it's a new phenomenon, maybe the conversations have just changed a little, gotten a little grittier. Still the sentiment is there, we want church to be a place where we can be real and still find acceptance and love. I even saw it in the youth group setting. When we combined the high school and young adult group for the summer, the conversations got grittier, things were said that were more authentic, less covered with the constant thought (on my part) that I would have to answer to their parents if we went too far in the conversation. After one such conversation, S looked at her friend and said "I like grown-up youth group." Christians being real...it's appealing.
I sat around a living room tonight with four other Christian women being real...it was good.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Looking back
When I first started in Youth Ministry, a verse kept popping up for me. It was 2 Corinthians 5:7 "We live by faith, not by sight." It wound up with a necklace with that verse on it. It became a theme verse for my life at the time. I was doing a lot of faith walking at that time, doing a job that I knew God had called me into but I felt ill-prepared for at times. I was up for the challenge though.
A few years in a young man and his dad started coming to church. The young man was very quiet. Really, really quiet. He had a way of kind of bobbing his head as if agreeing or understanding people just to get them to stop asking him questions. He had a hard time making eye contact and guarded his emotions carefully. I heard from his dad, that the young man had a temper, that it was just the two of them and his dad was very insistent on his son coming to youth group. I knew that this young man had two paths that he could go down. One that might be tough but lead to success eventually. The other was a path I didn't even want to think about...one that would bring him a lot of heartache and most likely jail time.
The young man came to youth group, at first because his dad insisted, but more and more because he found a safe place to land. He began to make friends, he went on big trips with us, he began to change, become less angry and distant and began to open up. I broke a "rule" and drove him home many times, just because I knew he would open up more and more as we drove in the car. It was on a summer trip that a huge breakthrough happened. It was our annual houseboat trip. One night he approached and asked if the two of us could talk. We headed to the top of the houseboat and sat out under the stars for at least an hour without interruptions. He talked about his life, his family, his feelings about his mom and more. It was an hour that every Youth Minister hopes for but rarely gets to see. An hour where God was talking to the soul of this young man and the walls of his heart were beginning to soften. I will never forget that hour.
Life did indeed deal the young man some hard blows in the next few years. He graduated high school and moved away and for the last few years I didn't know what had happened to him. I heard rumors, I saw his myspace page, I prayed hard for this young man. There was a picture in my office that I looked at daily of some of my favorite youth kids and his face was one of them smiling back at me. I thought of him often with fondness and yet that feeling of regret that I didn't do enough, try enough to help him find his way in life, to help him find his way to God.
A few months ago I opened my Facebook account and there was a friend request from this young man. I couldn't hit the "confirm" button fast enough! We've left comments on each other's page. I've seen that life has been a challenge and he's dealing with the consequences but yet there is something there. His path is taking an upswing, things are going well. Today I received a message from him that made me cry. He just found out I'm quitting and wanted to check in. Amongst the couple of lines was this, "You've made a big difference in a lot of people's lives. If you need a recommendation, you know who to call." I didn't know. I really didn't know...but I'm so grateful to know now.
I've spent a long time living by faith and not by sight. Faith that God will work through me, in spite of me. While I don't know this where this young man's faith lies, I do know that good has been done, that I've been faithful to God's call and that in the process I've been blessed to be a part the lives of some amazing young people. Live by faith, not by sight. Every so often I appreciate the sight. Kind of helps me to keep blindly walking.
A few years in a young man and his dad started coming to church. The young man was very quiet. Really, really quiet. He had a way of kind of bobbing his head as if agreeing or understanding people just to get them to stop asking him questions. He had a hard time making eye contact and guarded his emotions carefully. I heard from his dad, that the young man had a temper, that it was just the two of them and his dad was very insistent on his son coming to youth group. I knew that this young man had two paths that he could go down. One that might be tough but lead to success eventually. The other was a path I didn't even want to think about...one that would bring him a lot of heartache and most likely jail time.
The young man came to youth group, at first because his dad insisted, but more and more because he found a safe place to land. He began to make friends, he went on big trips with us, he began to change, become less angry and distant and began to open up. I broke a "rule" and drove him home many times, just because I knew he would open up more and more as we drove in the car. It was on a summer trip that a huge breakthrough happened. It was our annual houseboat trip. One night he approached and asked if the two of us could talk. We headed to the top of the houseboat and sat out under the stars for at least an hour without interruptions. He talked about his life, his family, his feelings about his mom and more. It was an hour that every Youth Minister hopes for but rarely gets to see. An hour where God was talking to the soul of this young man and the walls of his heart were beginning to soften. I will never forget that hour.
Life did indeed deal the young man some hard blows in the next few years. He graduated high school and moved away and for the last few years I didn't know what had happened to him. I heard rumors, I saw his myspace page, I prayed hard for this young man. There was a picture in my office that I looked at daily of some of my favorite youth kids and his face was one of them smiling back at me. I thought of him often with fondness and yet that feeling of regret that I didn't do enough, try enough to help him find his way in life, to help him find his way to God.
A few months ago I opened my Facebook account and there was a friend request from this young man. I couldn't hit the "confirm" button fast enough! We've left comments on each other's page. I've seen that life has been a challenge and he's dealing with the consequences but yet there is something there. His path is taking an upswing, things are going well. Today I received a message from him that made me cry. He just found out I'm quitting and wanted to check in. Amongst the couple of lines was this, "You've made a big difference in a lot of people's lives. If you need a recommendation, you know who to call." I didn't know. I really didn't know...but I'm so grateful to know now.
I've spent a long time living by faith and not by sight. Faith that God will work through me, in spite of me. While I don't know this where this young man's faith lies, I do know that good has been done, that I've been faithful to God's call and that in the process I've been blessed to be a part the lives of some amazing young people. Live by faith, not by sight. Every so often I appreciate the sight. Kind of helps me to keep blindly walking.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
I think I found the cure for bloggers block/tired writer syndrome. Just write a post that says "I'm going silent" and BAM! the ideas start flowing and won't be contained.
For instance, I've been pondering for days the plethora of bad driving happening around me these days. I realize that I can be, too, a bad driver. I work at not being a bad driver but it does happen. However I have yet to pass someone in a turnout...literally the car being passed was still driving on the road and the car doing the passing was in the turnout. I have yet to get into a right turn only lane, only to deliberately go straight, through a red light, to beat the traffic up the hill, then down the hill to the (wait for it) red light. It is a miracle that there aren't more car accidents in a day. We really should have more of a fear of driving than a fear of flying. Just sayin'.
There are also the little gems of youth ministry that I'm tucking away in the memory bank. Like yesterday's pool party where Joe Suavo pushed multiple youth into the pool. One tried to retaliate and attempted 3 times to dump a bucket of water over Joe Suavo's head. It didn't completely work. Joe Suavo managed to dump the bucket on said youth member each time, to which this 8th grade boy finally spluttered out from amongst the waterfall gushing off his head "You're just a big meanie!". The howls of laughter felt good.
Maybe the blog post should be about the Mom who approached me after VBS yesterday with kids in tow and said "Every morning in our car there is a debate about whether the song says 'peace like a river' or 'geese like a river' ". We decided peace made much more sense.
Another potential topic could be the impending date of my departure as Youth Director and impending entrance into the world of the unemployed. People keep asking what I am planning on doing and all I can think about is taking a break, going on vacation, doing nothing. I'm actually beginning to feel a little stressed because I'm not stressed about finding a job. I did get a start on my resume and even got some resume counseling tonight from one of the young adults. Just can't get too worked up about not having a job...yet. Not having health insurance, yeah that one is beginning to become a little bit of a worry.
Yep, the bloggers block/tired writer syndrome seems to have abated for today.
For instance, I've been pondering for days the plethora of bad driving happening around me these days. I realize that I can be, too, a bad driver. I work at not being a bad driver but it does happen. However I have yet to pass someone in a turnout...literally the car being passed was still driving on the road and the car doing the passing was in the turnout. I have yet to get into a right turn only lane, only to deliberately go straight, through a red light, to beat the traffic up the hill, then down the hill to the (wait for it) red light. It is a miracle that there aren't more car accidents in a day. We really should have more of a fear of driving than a fear of flying. Just sayin'.
There are also the little gems of youth ministry that I'm tucking away in the memory bank. Like yesterday's pool party where Joe Suavo pushed multiple youth into the pool. One tried to retaliate and attempted 3 times to dump a bucket of water over Joe Suavo's head. It didn't completely work. Joe Suavo managed to dump the bucket on said youth member each time, to which this 8th grade boy finally spluttered out from amongst the waterfall gushing off his head "You're just a big meanie!". The howls of laughter felt good.
Maybe the blog post should be about the Mom who approached me after VBS yesterday with kids in tow and said "Every morning in our car there is a debate about whether the song says 'peace like a river' or 'geese like a river' ". We decided peace made much more sense.
Another potential topic could be the impending date of my departure as Youth Director and impending entrance into the world of the unemployed. People keep asking what I am planning on doing and all I can think about is taking a break, going on vacation, doing nothing. I'm actually beginning to feel a little stressed because I'm not stressed about finding a job. I did get a start on my resume and even got some resume counseling tonight from one of the young adults. Just can't get too worked up about not having a job...yet. Not having health insurance, yeah that one is beginning to become a little bit of a worry.
Yep, the bloggers block/tired writer syndrome seems to have abated for today.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
This, that and the other thing
This July has not been like last July. Last July it was just downright pleasant all month. This July has had more warm days. Next week is VBS week. I expect heat, heat and more heat. Ugh. At least we have moved VBS to the morning and we aren't trying giving ourselves heat exhaustion anymore. One can only hope the fog will roll in every night and cool off the sanctuary.
I forgot to update y'all on things that have been going on. A few weeks ago I got to officiate at a wedding! Nope, I haven't been ordained. There are counties in California that deputize people to perform a single wedding ceremony. The couple who got married asked if I would be willing to go that route and I jumped at the chance! The one reason that I would choose to be ordained right now would be to be a part of weddings. Thanks to the County of San Diego for making it happen! It was very special, especially because I've known the young man who got married since he was 6 years old and hiding under the table during Sunday School. :) I did, however, learn a couple of things. Number 1: If the couple says "outdoor wedding on a cliff" it's probably a good idea to sew rocks into the hem of my skirt and put my hair all the way up. Number 2: invest in a nice looking three ring binder. Saves a lot of panic over whether or not you'll lose pages. And yes, I will need to know all this again because in September I get to officiate at my cousin's wedding. Very, very cool.
In sad news, Hop-a-long hops no more. I'm pretty sure he helped some other animal get full one night before I went to San Diego. In more happier news (for me anyway), the de-con on is working. One more rat gone. We do now have a chipmunk that scampers across the driveway and up trees and around corners and is basically making himself at home. Papa Bear came back and the birds are happy. So happy that they can't seem to stop in time on their way to the bird food and keep slamming into the floor to ceiling windows. Seriously, there were 3 birds in less than 5 minutes that hit the windows the other day. I think one hit pretty hard too...it kept trying to fly in the window. It was just fluttering it's wings and pressing it's face against the glass. I think keeping the blinds closed, at least part way, would help, but Papa Bear likes them wide open. Oh well, he's the one who has to clean the windows.
Sunday I preached at FPC for the last time as an employee of the church. It was on the woman who had been bleeding for 12 years. The sermon went well at both services but I have to say I'm pretty glad to be done with being the worship leader and preaching on the same day. Even though it only happened a few times a year, it's just too much to do in the service. Before I gave the sermon at the 2nd service, my friend Beth, her husband and a friend of theirs the song below. Beth started in singing the first line and I found myself in tears. As the song continued and the harmonies came in I had to close my eyes and just pray that I would be able to stand up and preach. It was just so good...and it sounded even better than the group who sings it below...but I am biased. :)
I forgot to update y'all on things that have been going on. A few weeks ago I got to officiate at a wedding! Nope, I haven't been ordained. There are counties in California that deputize people to perform a single wedding ceremony. The couple who got married asked if I would be willing to go that route and I jumped at the chance! The one reason that I would choose to be ordained right now would be to be a part of weddings. Thanks to the County of San Diego for making it happen! It was very special, especially because I've known the young man who got married since he was 6 years old and hiding under the table during Sunday School. :) I did, however, learn a couple of things. Number 1: If the couple says "outdoor wedding on a cliff" it's probably a good idea to sew rocks into the hem of my skirt and put my hair all the way up. Number 2: invest in a nice looking three ring binder. Saves a lot of panic over whether or not you'll lose pages. And yes, I will need to know all this again because in September I get to officiate at my cousin's wedding. Very, very cool.In sad news, Hop-a-long hops no more. I'm pretty sure he helped some other animal get full one night before I went to San Diego. In more happier news (for me anyway), the de-con on is working. One more rat gone. We do now have a chipmunk that scampers across the driveway and up trees and around corners and is basically making himself at home. Papa Bear came back and the birds are happy. So happy that they can't seem to stop in time on their way to the bird food and keep slamming into the floor to ceiling windows. Seriously, there were 3 birds in less than 5 minutes that hit the windows the other day. I think one hit pretty hard too...it kept trying to fly in the window. It was just fluttering it's wings and pressing it's face against the glass. I think keeping the blinds closed, at least part way, would help, but Papa Bear likes them wide open. Oh well, he's the one who has to clean the windows.
Sunday I preached at FPC for the last time as an employee of the church. It was on the woman who had been bleeding for 12 years. The sermon went well at both services but I have to say I'm pretty glad to be done with being the worship leader and preaching on the same day. Even though it only happened a few times a year, it's just too much to do in the service. Before I gave the sermon at the 2nd service, my friend Beth, her husband and a friend of theirs the song below. Beth started in singing the first line and I found myself in tears. As the song continued and the harmonies came in I had to close my eyes and just pray that I would be able to stand up and preach. It was just so good...and it sounded even better than the group who sings it below...but I am biased. :)
Monday, July 18, 2011
Certified!
I am more and more convinced that God has a great sense of humor. Little things are happening all the time that lead me to believe that God is having some fun with me. I'm O.K. with it, I like to laugh and I laugh easily sometimes (maybe a little too easily). It may be that I'm in a better place and able to see God's humor in life clearer or maybe I'm just looking to God for a little laughter.
In late May, when I was pretty sure I was moving on to the next thing in life but hadn't told anyone about my decision, the Pastor asked if I had finished my Certificate in Youth Ministry that I had started years before. It got me to thinking that I had taken the final class a year before but hadn't yet seen anything that said "Congratulations! You're done!". The Personnel team was wanting the official piece of paper saying I was certified, so I sent a quick email to the program administrator and found out that I was supposed to fill out a piece of paper. Who knew?! Obviously, not me!
I filled out the paper and sent it in. I did notice the little box on the paper that said "please give us the address you will be at in 6-8 weeks". Hmm...would it really take 6-8 weeks? Evidently, it does. Today, about 6 weeks after mailing the paper in, I got an email. I am officially certified! My paper certificate will be arriving in the mail. My transcripts will reflect my certification status AND I can officially update my resume (seriously, it said that).
It's just a piece of paper, but it seems like so much is coming full circle and that God is having a little giggle. Seems fitting that I get the piece of paper just as this chapter of my time in Youth Ministry is coming to an end.
I'm adding a new line to my resume--Certificate in Youth Ministry...wonder if that will come in handy in the future?
In late May, when I was pretty sure I was moving on to the next thing in life but hadn't told anyone about my decision, the Pastor asked if I had finished my Certificate in Youth Ministry that I had started years before. It got me to thinking that I had taken the final class a year before but hadn't yet seen anything that said "Congratulations! You're done!". The Personnel team was wanting the official piece of paper saying I was certified, so I sent a quick email to the program administrator and found out that I was supposed to fill out a piece of paper. Who knew?! Obviously, not me!
I filled out the paper and sent it in. I did notice the little box on the paper that said "please give us the address you will be at in 6-8 weeks". Hmm...would it really take 6-8 weeks? Evidently, it does. Today, about 6 weeks after mailing the paper in, I got an email. I am officially certified! My paper certificate will be arriving in the mail. My transcripts will reflect my certification status AND I can officially update my resume (seriously, it said that).
It's just a piece of paper, but it seems like so much is coming full circle and that God is having a little giggle. Seems fitting that I get the piece of paper just as this chapter of my time in Youth Ministry is coming to an end.
I'm adding a new line to my resume--Certificate in Youth Ministry...wonder if that will come in handy in the future?
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Things I'll miss, things I won't
There are certain things that I will miss about my job. Last night's adventure to the Food Bank is one. I love helping out at the Food Bank and will probably do that by myself anyway, but I will miss the camaraderie of the youth and young adults...not to mention the In 'n' Out Burger/Krispy Kreme stop. I will definitely miss these kinds of nights.
There are certain things that I will not miss though. Like the intermittent Internet connection in my office. I will not miss the frustration of trying to do a quick search for a youth talk and taking 15 minutes to connect and disconnect and reconnect to the Internet because the wind is blowing outside or whatever seriously stupid reason the Internet connection has. I will not miss struggling with the Internet at work.
There are certain things that I will not miss though. Like the intermittent Internet connection in my office. I will not miss the frustration of trying to do a quick search for a youth talk and taking 15 minutes to connect and disconnect and reconnect to the Internet because the wind is blowing outside or whatever seriously stupid reason the Internet connection has. I will not miss struggling with the Internet at work.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Dots of life
- This morning I took Adventure Boy and Creative Guy to soccer camp. I had the windows rolled down a little but the interior of the car was warming up due to the bright ball of light that has been insistent on being around the last few days. Adventure Boy piped up from the back "It's getting hot in here. Roll up the windows." My reply: "If I roll up the windows the car will only get warmer." "NO," was Adventure Boy's response, "it will cool down." Thus said the child who has known air conditioning in vehicles his whole life.
- Last night was Messy Night at the church. My last messy night as youth director. It was good. I especially enjoyed the power washer that we had to clean up the mess afterwards. The job that usually takes 2 hours, took just a little over one. Nice.
- Tonight was Bible Study with the Young Adults and High School youth. It was relaxed, filled with laughter and good discussions. This is what I will miss about my job.
- For a long while our household has been having a little bit of a struggle with the newspaper delivery person. Namely, getting the newspaper delivered, correction, the RIGHT newspaper delivered. A couple of weeks ago Papa Bear was actually swearing into the phone, albeit it was the automated answering system at the newspaper but he was still swearing. I've been picking up the paper this last week and what an adventure it has been! We got the correct paper two days, wrong paper one day, wrong paper and correct paper the next, wrong paper the next day, two day's worth of copies of the right paper and today, well, today I finally just started laughing. We got not one, but two papers, both of the them different, neither of them the paper we subscribe too. They were for the correct day though! I think I'm going to pray for the newspaper delivery person.
- I don't care how old I get, I hope to never outgrow animated movies. Excited to see Cars II and the new Winnie the Pooh movie this summer!
- Currently reading Ashley Judd's book, All That is Bitter and Sweet. My celebrity gawker side is being satisfied with the glimpse into her life and my God centered helping soul is resonating with her experiences in helping others. And I'm only a few chapters in!
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Schedule
It's VBS week...that's Vacation Bible School, for those who are curious. Not for the church that I am employed with but for the church down the street and around the corner. A couple of years ago I was asked to lead music for them. I said sure and have been doing so ever since. It's always fun to see how other groups run their programs, helps keep the creativity flowing. I also enjoy the fact that all I do is lead the band. That's it. I play 3 songs at the beginning, 2 songs at the end and am done. This year they have increased the song load, so we have wound up doing 4 songs at the beginning and 3 at the end. Not a big deal, it's fun.
As fun as that is, the reality always strikes me about this time during the week that I still have my regular job to do. Morning VBS really wreaks havoc with my schedule! My usual schedule allows me to have most mornings free, seeing as how I work a lot of evening hours. VBS means I have to be at neighbor church at 8:30am. Today, I went from VBS, to work church for a staff meeting, to a lunch with K and Creative Guy, to work church and then to the beach with the youth groups. Really, not a bad afternoon, but I left my house at 8:10am and arrived home at 8pm...to a house that had been closed up all day long, it was 86 degrees inside, and plants that needed attention. Yeah, VBS messes with my schedule. But it sure is fun!
As fun as that is, the reality always strikes me about this time during the week that I still have my regular job to do. Morning VBS really wreaks havoc with my schedule! My usual schedule allows me to have most mornings free, seeing as how I work a lot of evening hours. VBS means I have to be at neighbor church at 8:30am. Today, I went from VBS, to work church for a staff meeting, to a lunch with K and Creative Guy, to work church and then to the beach with the youth groups. Really, not a bad afternoon, but I left my house at 8:10am and arrived home at 8pm...to a house that had been closed up all day long, it was 86 degrees inside, and plants that needed attention. Yeah, VBS messes with my schedule. But it sure is fun!
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Announcement
The written version of what I shared in church this morning...life is changing!!
In the youth room downstairs, there is a wall that we have dubbed the Level Ground Wall of Fame. On the wall are the hand prints and names of youth who have been a part of the high school ministry here at Felton Pres. It started out as rite of passage, a way showing the youth that they have a place here, that they belong to the body of Christ. Over the years we have also added hand prints of youth leaders who have been a part of the group for a time. Those hand prints bring back great memories of people and adventures that we have experienced in youth ministry over the last 12 years.
In the last few months I’ve spent time praying, listening, talking to God and doing a lot of soul searching. As clearly as I heard God calling me to be a part of the ministry at Felton Pres, I am hearing God calling me out of ministry. To that end I have decided to resign as the Director of Youth and Young Adult Ministries and first service Worship leader. My hand print will soon join those on the Level Ground Wall of Fame. I have been so blessed to be employed here, to grow and explore the calling on my life to reach out to the youth of this community and to share in the work that God is doing through this church. I will be forever grateful for the love, grace, encouragement and support that this congregation has shown me, not only as an employee, but as one who has grown up in this church.
My future is very unclear. God hasn’t revealed what’s next for me, though I’m sure some of you have some suggestions. I’m not heading to school, there isn’t another job, I just know that God is asking me to step back from ministry here and take a leap of faith. I do so confident that God has called me to this decision and that God will guide me wherever I am supposed to go…or as Ellen M. told me the other day, in the spirit of Jonah and the Whale, I’m excited to see where God is going to throw me up.
I will not be leaving until mid-August. My end date is officially August 14th, so there are still 8 weeks of ministry to do here and I do so excited about the future but with a heavy heart. Leaving here will be hard on many levels but most simply because you all have been my church family for 36 years. Thank you for giving me the opportunity 12 years ago to answer God’s call. I ask now, that you pray with me and for me as God and I begin a new adventure together.
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