The 2nd way I received help when I didn't want to ask for it...correct that, when I didn't know to ask for it.
For a couple of years there were four of us, all in youth ministry, who would get together and collaborate on activities for our youth groups. We would also get together just to talk about life and ministry. We traveled to Youth Worker Conventions together and basically became really good friends, with youth ministry and God being the commonality. There was one year when that friendship transcended youth ministry and definitely became more about just getting through life. At the end of that year, one of us left youth ministry, another moved away and then there were two...until I left my job.
My friend, T, wasn't about to let me leave youth ministry fully. The last couple of months as I prepared to leave my job, he was preparing to hire someone, very, very, very part-time to help with the stuff that was keeping him from doing ministry fully. He offered me the position. Seeing a very small paycheck come in the door when I was letting go of a nice paycheck (though I was not without the ability to survive: see yesterday's post) was one reason I said yes but really the other reason was I needed to feel useful. Every week for 6 months I had something to do every Tuesday. I had a place to go, someone who needed my help and who was counting on me to get the job done. I didn't know I would need that sense of being useful, having a purpose but there it was. I didn't know I needed help, I didn't know I to ask for it but God knew.
It's been a year and I have a new job now. Not a full-time job and I'm surviving. I'm not sure how long my very, very part time job will last but for now, I'm content. Not just to be helped by a friend but to help him as well.
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