Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Lost and found

Have you ever found something that you weren't aware that you had lost?  I had that happen last week on the shores of Lake Tahoe.  As the wind blew across the lake sending waves crashing onto the rocks below, as clouds floated overhead covering the sun for sporadic moments and lizards dashed around my legs letting me know that I was in their territory, I found something I didn't know I had lost...I found my home.  Not a physical home because, clearly, I was encroaching on the lizards home, but my spiritual home.  Okay, truthfully, I didn't completely find that home until a couple of days later, but this particular day that I am talking about, I found that I had been missing my home and didn't know it was lost.

It makes sense though.  I have been lost for awhile now.  I've been going through the motions, finding glimpses of God in the midst of the mundane, feeling more and more cut off from God, really spiritually dry and extremely tired of working so hard to hear so little from God.  All it took was sitting at the lizard's doorstep and I began to feel more buoyant, lighter, free.  It was there that God and I had a conversation, there where I asked some questions, heard some answers and received confirmation.  It was there that I realized what I had lost because I was getting it back.

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