Yesterday I decided that I was going to go back to Tahoe for the weekend. Tony Campolo is speaking at a church in Tahoe this weekend and I wanted to hear what he has to say. First, though, I knew that I needed to get the oil changed in my car. So I tried last night at the big box store auto place. I stood in the lobby with about 5 other people as one employee walked in, looked at all of us and walked back out. I left.
This morning I took my car to a local place. Got right in, sat down and started working on the order for my cousin's wedding ceremony in a couple of weeks. Pretty soon there was the mechanic sitting next to me with a bolt in his hand, or what I came to know as the oil plug. Long story short, I own a Ford, everything is expensive and I won't be going to Tahoe this weekend. G.G. came to my rescue.
Over lunch with G.G. I started thinking about the amount of trust I have in God and how incredible that comes across to believers and non-believers alike. There are people out there really worried about me and the future. They keep asking very good questions about whether or not I'm looking for jobs or what I might be thinking about for the future or what I want to do with my life. My answer isn't calming any nerves. I don't know and I'm not worried. I'm not trying to deliberately be naive or vague or flippant about it all, I really just trust that God is going to make things happen when God wants them to happen and I just need to trust.
This process makes me aware that most followers of Jesus trust in God's plan only to a certain extent and then take control and let things happen their way. We want to believe that God has a plan and will take care of us, but
when push comes to shove it's so much easier to trust in us then to
trust a God that is pretty invisible at times. We may say that we trust God, but the truth is we usually trust God when things are going right, not when they seem out of control. I'm totally guilty of that usually! Truthfully, I would probably more concerned right now if I didn't have some reserves to fall back on...reserves that I know God provided, which makes it even more apparent that God is in control!
My knowledge of my situation, though, is not what other people see and even when I explain it there is a look of disbelief in the eyes of those around me. How could I walk away from a perfectly good job and not have a plan or be worried?! I'll say it again, it's all God. I know that things will be okay, that I will be okay. I just need to trust.